Tuesday 10 July 2012

FGC #18- Letter.

My dearest Hope,

I wish this letter to find you in good health and pray that all your wounds have healed. I know you will have many questions for me but they are the same questions I am asking myself. You are my everything and there is nothing I want more than to hold you in my arms forever. However life and the world have conspired against us and I have had to leave you with my sister with promises of returning but deep down I know that kiss on your forehead may be the last one. Please do not ever think that I didn't love you. I am not abandoning you but merely protecting you.

I hope your aunt has kept her promise and you are only reading this after you have turned 18. Hopefully by this age you will have a better understanding of what has happened and will find it within your heart to forgive me. Your father was never a nice man. I know that people always like to blame the other person  when a relationship ends but there was something inhuman about him. He treated me like no man should treat a wife.

Ill also take the time now to let you know you once had a brother. You may have been too young to remember him. Jackson was a beautiful soul. He treasured you and would watch you for hours when all the other boys were playing video games. He tried to defend me from your father one night and copped such a beating his little body couldn't pull through. Any stronger woman would have left then but like a fool I stayed.

It wasn't until a few years later when I came home and you told me that "Daddy, showed me love like he shows you." like it was something to be proud of. Sick to my stomach and racked with guilt I packed you a bag. I am sitting here at my sisters writing this for you knowing that I am about to leave you. If I ran with you he would find us so I need to put a stop to him. With an illegally purchased handgun I am about to head over there. If you are reading this then something happened to me.

Please know I love you more than anything else in the world and I hope these actions have not caused you harm my precious darling.

Love always and forever
Mummy xxx

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